you smell like my future boyfriend?

the sun's up, you're still here.

somethings been bothering me lately. one problem at a time. thats how it is. i need my sleep so bad. there was one time i was so tired i went to bed, then ar ound 4-5am i suddenly woke up. i was sweating and shivering. i thought i was imagining things but im not. it happened quite often and that scares the hell out of me. i just didnt how to deal with it. i told my mum about it, she said that im thinking too much. yeah probably i am. no big deal, thats what i thought. after waking up almost everyday at 4am, then i started having deja vu. i dont get deja vu that often though. once in a bluemoon. and im thinking "holy shit! whats going on?" and everytime i get deja vu i'll scream/yell suddenly. i dont know. i have the urge to do so. its so weird. but maybe that doesnt mean anything. probably like my mom said, im thinking too much. but im pretty sure there's something weird going on. i try to not think too much of it. and sometimes during class, i can daydream even when someone's talking to me! thats so not me! i have a bad feeling about this. :(


and during that time, how i wished someone was beside me, comforting me, making me warm & let me know everything's gonna be fine. and i got nothing to worry about. :( i told one of my friend about it, she told to go see a doctor. maybe i need sleeping pills to calm my nerves. i know im not crazy but i obviously know what's going on with me. but as soon as the waking up is over, im thinking maybe im just scared of being left alone. being replaced for someone new. getting dumped. maybe thats just it. i think too much that i didnt realise it was right infront of me. so much for knight and shining armour. xx


P/S: I'm missing someone at the moment. :p